Prince Harry Makes Satanic Hand Gesture Next to Melania Trump

Now we were going to let this one slide and wait for some fun social media reactions first, but we couldn’t resist reporting on this ASAP. Prince Harry of the British Royal Family appeared alongside Melanie Trump at the Invictus… Continue Reading

9 Reasons Why Right Wing Men Make Better Boyfriends

Politics is personal, after all – you are what you believe. Your views are usually shaped by your outlook and values. This is quite apparent when choosing who to spend considerable amount of time with i.e. – that special somebody… Continue Reading

Is Theresa May a Robot?

Whatever it be, Theresa May’s admission that she used to naughtily enjoy running through wheat fields or her sinister and quite frankly evil laugh that once resembled Skeletor from ‘He-Man: Masters of The Universe’, Theresa May has had a lot of… Continue Reading

Sex in the Multicultural City

Sex and the City, an iconic staple in popular culture that requires little introduction. Well, unless you are living in Syria and have no access to cable or have never seen an independent, strong-minded woman with high testosterone of course.… Continue Reading

Why Was There Never A Rapper Called Ice (fill the blank)?

Hey readers! We thought we’d bring you some of our thoughts about why there was never more rappers that started their artist moniker with the prefix of “Ice” in the Hip-Hop and Rap genre. Yes, the popular music of Hip-Hop… Continue Reading

New Study Suggests People STILL Believe Android Phone’s Are Better Than iPhone’s

At Brainstain, we have recently conducted a new thorough study which proves quite equivocally that people who really believe that Android phones, (such as Samsung or HTC), are better than iPhones, may actually in fact be suffering from a form… Continue Reading

Why Hasn’t Linda Clarke Destroyed ISIS Yet?!

Remember Linda Clarke? She was the outraged mum who back in 2015, soon after the Charlie Hebdo terrorist atrocity that left 12 staff of the satirical magazine massacred by ISIS, pledged to single handily wipe out the Islamic State and… Continue Reading

10 Ways Ariana Grande Could Potentially Put A Stop To ISIS Once And For All

You know the drill by now… Bomb explodes, mass hysteria, social media frenzy, countless casualties, tweets, prayers and tea lights, Islamophobia accusations, constantly told by left-wing and social justice commentators not to jump to any conclusions and… ISIS takes responsibility… Continue Reading

Notorious Gotham City Mobster “The Penguin” Urges UK To Back Jeremy Corbyn In Election

The Penguin, real name Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot has called on Brits to vote for the Labour Party and back Jeremy Corbyn ahead of the UK elections. But despite his notoriety, the self-proclaimed “gentleman of crime” who often wears a top… Continue Reading

Newsflash: Spanish Scientists Discover Alcohol Makes You Fat!

“Buenos Dias everybody!” So, we have some completely unbelievable news coming at us today from some Spanish scientific geniuses that have concluded that if you swap beer for water, then you will avoid obesity by a fifth and it also… Continue Reading

7 Possibilities Of Who The NHS Cyber-Attack Culprits Could Be

Last week the NHS suffered a catastrophic event of epic proportions, and no, Jeremy Corbyn had not been elected into Downing Street. Hospitals across England were hit by a large-scale cyber-attack which had locked staff out of their computers and… Continue Reading

5 Things to Do While We Wait for World War 3

How long have we been warned now that we should start preparing for World War 3 as heightened tensions between the US and North Korea threatens to hit boiling point? It seems that you can’t scroll through a news-feed or come… Continue Reading

10 Ways in Which Recruiters Are Worse than ISIS

Forget ISIS, Recruiters are the real embodiment of evil and terrorism. While deadly ‘Lone Wolf’ attacks have become a daily occurrence by Islamic extremists in the western world, in the world of job applications and CV’s, Recruiters are the real… Continue Reading

Early Eurovision Song Contest Prediction: France Set To Get 10 Points from Germany

“L’Allemagne donne dix points a la France.” (APPLAUSE!!!) Well, what a weekend. A weekend that would literally decide the future of France. Now after Emmanuel Macron, 39, was elected last night to the cheers of sheep nation-wide, it’s now well and… Continue Reading

Transforming Terrorist Trucks in Truck Warfare Hell

A transforming species of synthetic intelligence that are able to metamorphose into Trucks have been waging war on civilisation as we know it. These ‘’Terrorist Trucks’’ dubbed by the media, have left carnage and destruction in their path, leaving casualties behind… Continue Reading

The Evil Twitter Egg Has Finally Cracked

Eggs, some people see them as a form of life for non-mammals, some see them as a form of breakfast and well, some Twitter users see them as a sign of an abusive Twitter account that violates their existence and safe place. Yes,… Continue Reading

Hillary Clinton Elected As NEW President of the United States of America

We have some amazing top-secret “confidential” breaking news coming at us today! The Democrats finally found the “Russian Hacker” that had seemingly made everyone vote for Donald Trump in the U.S. Presidential election of 2016. Say it isn’t so? Yes, but… Continue Reading

Article 50 Has Been Officially Trigged And Now Armageddon Is Upon Us!

This could potentially be the last article you read from us here at Brainstrain, shudder the thought! Sixty-five million years ago, an immense asteroid struck the Earth, raising clouds of dust that chilled the global climate and wiped out the… Continue Reading

Synthetic Drug Epidemic: Prelude to a Zombie Apocalypse?

Now, we’ve all heard of the Zombie apocalypse in popular culture in recent times and even with people’s fascination with Zombies in popular TV series such as ‘The Walking Dead’ or with films, like the franchise of ‘Resident Evil’ or… Continue Reading

Is Valentine’s Day Secretly Racist?

With so many things considered “racist” by liberal lefties these days, we wanted to ponder whether Valentine’s Day is really racist or not? And, low and behold, we found that it might just very well be “racist” indeed. Just think… Continue Reading

Migrants vs Zombies: They are taking over the world!

The foul stench of festering flesh, rat infested pollution and rotten feces reeks through the bleak air as the sound of crying children and women weeping in agony and despair eerily echo’s in the backdrop over the grey and dejected… Continue Reading

Western Society: Cold Winters, TV, and Nothingness

Have you ever stopped and wondered; why do you live in a place where your face hurts from the cold? If you have, then no doubt you live in a place where nobody enjoys the cold winters and you may… Continue Reading

Meek Bearded Man Claims His Wife is “Just Visiting Friends” This Weekend

Northern Hemisphere, near the Prime Meridian – There we were, sitting outside a pub, when the three people sitting next to us became abundantly clear, this was your average Friday night in a boring pub, for these three men that… Continue Reading

Reality TV: ‘America’s Next Top Prostitute’ is Set for TV Deal

Just when you thought that the glory days of reality television were well and truly over, there’s been an incoming surge or revival if you will; of tasteless and downright politically incorrect programs set to be released on TV or… Continue Reading

The Skimpier The Bikini, The Better Your A** Looks

After an interesting weekend of lots of marching by a lots of big “moaners”, consisting of mostly women (feminists), sore losers and men wearing so-called, new “pussy-hats” for women’s rights (already given), there was as an undeniable pattern of whipped… Continue Reading

Typical ‘Man’s Man’ Spends 1 Hour in Hair Care Aisle. Becomes Confused.

Chattonooga, TN – inside this monstrous Walmart Supercentre store, recently stood Martin Williams, 43-years old, within the hair care section looking extremely bewildered for over 1 hour. It had taken him roughly 30 minutes to get there, in the first… Continue Reading

Swing Voters are Still Waiting on Madonna’s Blowjobs

With only five days to go until President Elect Donald Trump is inaugurated on January 20th 2017, in Washington D.C. this Friday, many so-called swing voters are still upset and they feel left “high and dry” by Madonna’s promises of blow… Continue Reading

9 Reasons Why ‘Nine Lives’ Should Win Big At The Academy Awards In 2017

What a massacre Sunday night exploded into, right? The 74th Golden Globes descended into anarchy and chaos when ‘Nine Lives’, the Kevin-Spacey-turns-into-a-cat-so-that-he-might-learn-the-true-meaning-of-a-family-movie, received no awards across the board. No doubt you’ve already seen the stories. Meryl Streep was crucified seconds… Continue Reading

R.B.F Might be the Best Way to Stay Looking Young

According to the Daily Mail, who wrote a story about resting bitch face yesterday, because they claim that some now believe that ‘RBF’ makes the people in question, who are said to possess it, also garner the plausible benefits of so-called… Continue Reading

Where Does the Missing Sock Go?

It’s that age-old question that has baffled everyone at some point in their lives and it is something which still causes enormous bewilderment across the world, “where does the missing sock go?” It’s already confused scientists, doctors, philosophers and every… Continue Reading